Sunday, October 11, 2009

Hero or Harlot?

I have a friend who told me she took someone else’s man, and she seemed to be really proud about it. Hear me when I say I am against man stealing!!! Just as I was about to rip into her, she asked me to allow her the courtesy of an explanation. She told me she didn’t feel bad because the women he was with didn’t deserve him. According to her, the guy is an absolute sweetheart and the woman he was dating was using him for his money and wasn’t trying to have a serious relationship with him when she knew he was looking for a mate. So my friend sweetly presented herself as a better option because she has no intention of using any man for his money and she is ready for a relationship with a wonderful man who appreciates her. Also, the man wasn’t all that keen on women with kids and my friend has none while the woman he was with had two. I admit that from her description of him they did sound like a good match, but he was still someone else’s boyfriend when they met.

Well, the guy and my friend have been going out for a while now and it’s going really well. They’ve met each other’s parents and it seems like one big happy family. Her parents have even started calling him their son-in-law. He is a great guy and he treats my girl like a queen. So this scenario led me to ponder…is it stealing if you see a man who is in an unhealthy relationship and you present him with a healthier option that he chooses to not only take under consideration but utilize?

I can honestly say I think that every woman is guilty of the above scenario. We’ve all seen a brother who is being used and abused and told him “If you were my man I wouldn’t do that or I’m the type of woman that ..” in hopes that he will begin to see us as a much better option. Although, your intentions may be good I’m not quite sure they’re honorable. You must admit that there is a bit of selfishness taking place. You wouldn’t want someone else’s man if you hadn’t seen first-hand his generosity, his above average looks, or his financial status and you may have even heard about his p-p-put it on ya' bedroom performance.

However, allowing a good man to be mistreated and not saying anything could be compared to seeing a car speeding intentionally toward a pedestrian and doing nothing to warn the would-be road kill to get out of the way. If you run into the street, grab the poor soul and thrust him and yourself to safety you would be considered a hero…right? Is it morally right to stand idly by and let a horrible relationship run its course and watch him become stressed, bitter angry and damaged when you could have intervened and soothed his pain away? I wonder. Now, this scenario only applies to single people in a relationship. Breaking up a marriage or people who have children is a completely different discussion.

So ladies what do you think, when you steal a good man away from a one star chick are you a hero or a harlot?

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