As a former radio personality I have met several people in the entertainment industry. Some famous, others not so famous. Some were brief chance encounters and others blossomed into friendships. I don’t have any mega star friends. I’ve never even had contact information for anyone that I would classify as a celebrity. Well maybe a couple, but most celebs change numbers frequently so it’s hard to stay in touch unless they really want to. However, I do tend to stay in touch with band members, managers, personal security, etc. If I meet somebody and I think they’re cool, I’ll keep in touch. As a rule, if we’re in each other’s home city we’ll hit the other up and do lunch or something. Well, one such person who will remain nameless is a phenomenal musician who lives in Atlanta. He’s extremely talented, and I’ve enjoyed watching his progression as a musician. I’ve seen him on stage with everyone from Jay Z to Usher to Teddy Riley. I am so proud of him. He is a true testament to what hard work can get you. I let him know I was coming to visit my sister in Atlanta and suggested that if he wasn’t on tour with someone we could do lunch or something. His text message response had me picking my jaw up off the floor.
HIM: I’ll be out of town but I don’t have lunch with women I’m not sleeping with.
ME: Really? That’s shallow.
HIM: I know right
As the old folks say, he’s smelling himself. Needless to say, we haven’t talked since. Have women become so desperate to be near a man with money and status that they’re doing anyone associated with him now? Or perhaps any ole successful man will do. If I ever decide to become a groupie you better believe I’m starting with the top dog, the man whose name is on the tickets. But that will never happen. My body is a temple and only worthy to be shared with someone who loves me, not someone I feel enamored with because watching him perform brings me joy.
Ladies, we have got to stop encouraging this type of behavior. As long as women continue to indulge in these friendships with benefits men with and with/out status will think it’s okay to take us out to eat and expect to have our cookies for dessert afterward.
To say my feelings were hurt by his response would be an understatement. I’ve known that cat for at least five years, and I’m sorry to see that this is what he’s come to. Groupie love is temporary but friendships can last a lifetime. I pray his perspective shifts back to what’s real before it’s too late. Any man who believes he has to sleep with every woman he eats a meal with obviously isn’t on my level. I’m as real as they come.
One of the best types of wisdom is knowing when to walk away. RIP to that one. I don’t do shallow.